The good news is, I found out I got into the middle school I wanted to. Woot!
The bad news is, I got into the middle school I wanted to. It has a really great science program and is big for the arts, which is why I wanted to go there. But it means moving across town and having to make new friends, which I’m not as excited about.
I’ve been at the same school for over 4 years now, so I have basically had the same friends for a long time. Its weird to think about having to start all over. Like, where do I even start and how do I not do it in an awkward way? So I thought I’d ask some grown up people and pull from my own experiences and put together this little list for making new friends in case any of you are going to be in the same position.
- Be kind- This is so basic that I almost didn’t want to put it, but since I’ve noticed a lot of girls in middle school can be snobby at times, I decided I should include this as a reminder. Its so much easier to make friends if you are a kind, polite, and thoughtful person. Who doesn’t want to spend time with someone who says “Good morning” to them or goes out of their way to compliment them on their new hair style? No need to be fake- just let your general good-natured self shine through.
- Make a move- Even if you are terminally shy, don’t be afraid to swallow your fears, plant on a smile, and approach someone new to say hi. Remember that nothing tragic will happen from simply saying hello to someone. I recommend approaching someone standing by themselves so that you don’t have the pressure of entering a big group to add to your nervousness. Plus, a person by themselves is likely just as nervous as you and probably wants someone to chat with.
- Be approachable- if you absolutely CAN’T stand the thought of walking up to a fellow human being and saying hi (hey- no judgment from me) then at the very least, don’t scare off anyone who might want to come over and talk to you. No sitting around in headphones, having your eyes glued to your insta, or scowling at the world while you’re eating lunch or waiting for your parental unit to pick you up after school. Peoplewatch or just stand there staring off into space- whatever it takes to keep you from closing yourself off to potential new friendships.
- Pay attention- parents are all about the small talk. “How about that weather? Hot enough for ya?” We’ve all heard them say that. Can you imagine walking up to someone in the lunch room and chatting it up about the weather? Me neither. Here’s is where paying attention will come in handy. Notice someone has a BTS pin on their bag? Or that they’re rocking a “My spirit animal is unicorn” t-shirt? Those are perfect conversation starters! You can ask their favorite song or what they think unicorns eat for dessert. Anything to start up a conversation and potentially find some common interests.
These are a few tips to get you started. Remember that we aren’t little kids anymore, so friends aren’t just going to show up in the sandbox next to us like they used to. We are going to have to kind of work at this. I’d love if you send me some of your tips or stories. We are in this together!